Franzday

Yes, a very special Friday post! Don't expect one next week, it's just that I'm about to beat Knight's highest monthly view record and I want him to keep me on the blog since I've just about proved that I'm good for business.

"Like this, this is good for business." - Triple H

So, I'm going to make it fairly short, but it's a message out to J.J. Abrams on his sequel trilogy. The prequel trilogy was what it was, a movie of prequels that elaborated about two sentences mentioned in Star Wars. It basically showed what caused the state of despair in Star Wars, and so the sequel trilogy should be like that. I liked the prequel trilogy, having had grown up in them. Yet, my request is very simple, push time ahead as much as the prequel trilogy pushed back, give the old cast either a background presence or cameo roles and do not, absolutely do NOT bring back Darth Vader.

In accord with the above meme, of course.

Short post, but meaningful.

I don't know, I just like this one.

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MYK

Cameron Diaz's Sex Tape?

No not an actual sex tape, though I bet the title will get me some more views. But, Jack Black, whose career has gone on Gulliver's Travels (irony, but truth because it fluctuates), has joined a movie entitled Sex Tape. This movie will be crap at certain points, funny at others and in the end, the person realizing how much they miss How I Met Your Mother.

A very, very long time.

I mean, the film, starring Sason Jegal (Yeah!) is basically a really long scavenger hunt. He and Cameron Diaz go looking for their sex tape which I'm guessing Jack Black stole. I mean that is the only explanation that makes sense. The movie will at first seem stupid, then make you laugh, be stupid, have laughs and then make you wonder why you watched it.

I should have an explanation, but, let's face it, I put this here so I don't have to go searching her Instagram for this picture later. Don't judge me, you know you've done it as well!

Don't get me wrong, it will be hella funny, it just won't be worth it. It'll be Netflix on a boring night funny quality movie. Wow... I should start complimenting movies sometime.

Is... is that Matt Dillon? What a fucking douchebag!

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MYK

Why Annie Will Not Be Good

There was something about the original Annie comic strip that made people laugh, something that will be eliminated in the new film. Now, me being a black man should be all excited that Daddy Warbucks got race swapped into Jaimie Foxx. That is nice and all and that girl with unpronounceable name is a good child actor. The real question is, is this movie all about seeing it for the sake of seeing it?

I'm surprised they didn't gender swap Annie into Andy

It's being produced by Will Smith. So you see, there was hope for the film, but after After Earth I just do not believe in him anymore. I mean what is he doing other than trying to make his son a box office star?

Yes, fuck you!

The real reason why it won't be good, it's a movie that got made because people would watch it. Same with the Garfield and Richie Rich films. There was no incentive but getting people to see how their childhoods got twisted by some director's stupid vision. In this case, Will Gluck. The man is a horrible director, I mean look at his resume, Friends with Benefits, really? That is the movie I watched online to see if Mila Kunis would go nude. Easy A, a film only girls watched and guys YouTubed scenes with Emma Stone in her underwear. And Fired Up! I've never even heard of that crap. This movie will not be good, forget all about watching it.

Bazinga! The only reason anyone watched this movie.

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MYK

How to Market Captain Marvel

Recently, Captain Marvel was renamed Shazam. Not to avoid confusion with who exactly Shazam was anymore, but rather so that the character could be marketed properly. After a lawsuit with Marvel, DC was unable to use the name Captain Marvel in marketing. So, he's always been marketed as Shazam. One thing that has always bugged me, though, is why not market him as the Champion of Shazam?

Language.

Everywhere you look, it's always going to be Shazam. I did not like it when Captain Marvel was renamed Shazam. It makes it more confusing, simply because most people won't get it. They will ask, "Wait, but if he says Shazam to make himself change and if he tells somebody his name is Shazam, won't he change back?" Yeah, that is it.

DAMN!

It should be Champion of Shazam as marketing. Hell, that would make a good film name as well, to use because I want him to be Captain Marvel in the film. That would be excellent, for Captain Marvel to appear as that around the same time as the release of Marvel's Captain Marvel movie. Since people don't really care for the female Marvel, only Mar-Vell, it would be a slap in Quesada's face.
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MYK

What if Spider-Man 3 Was Released in 2012?

The same year as the Avengers, which featured a multitude of plots, an ensemble cast, but only one villain. That is what distinguished Spider-Man 3 from the Avengers, the fact that one had only one villain. I am one of those who really liked Spider-Man 3 and doesn't give a crap about emo Parker strutting through the street.

You tell 'em Tiger.

This article is about Spider-Man 3 because, well, Knight's next video is going to be a tribute to the Spider-Man Trilogy. So, you know, this seemed fitting. I digress, however, and well, if Spider-Man 3 was released in 2012, eight years after Spider-Man 2, have no doubt that it would not be hated as much. I'm talking about the film being released as it was, wholly unedited, just filmed in 2010 and released in 2012. Yes, what if Spider-Man 3 was made eight years after Spider-Man 2?

Anybody care to argue?

You see, coming right off of The Avengers and squeezed right in between The Dark Knight Rises (much like The Amazing Spider-Man) the third flick would undoubtedly been seen by fans much of the same way as they did the reboot, a stepping stone from one awesome movie to the next. Only this time the stepping stone would have meant more because it would have been released eight years after. There would have been much more hype surrounding Venom, meaning this would have made at least a bit more than it did in 2007.

Frozen; I now wonder who that guy in the blue suit is.

Fan reaction to the film would have likely again been split, but here is the thing, unlike in 2007 where those who liked the film hid in a closet like gays, in 2012, their opinion would have been far louder. Why? Because being wedged in between The Avengers and also featuring an ensemble cast, that would have been a point for complaint, a loud one I daresay, a petty one I know. The Venom thing would have been met with mixed reception again, but only this time, with people being smarter, they wouldn't use that as an excuse to lambast the entire film. Instead, with all the mixed reception to Venom and all the positive to everything else (except the Sunday Stroll [which I like]), the film would have been received like Iron Man 3 was. It wouldn't change much, but it would have been seen in a better light.

Yep.

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MYK